Take chances. Tell the truth. Say no. Spend all your cash! Fall in love. Be random. Say I love you. Sing out loud. Laugh at a stupid joke. Cry. Get revenge. Apologize. Tell someone how much they mean to you. Tell the asshole what you feel. Let someone know what theyre missing. Laugh till your stomach hurts. Live life and never regret anything that you say, because it was what you were feeling at the moment.
Covering up your past will only make it harder to deal with in the future. You will always have to live with the knawing hole in your heart just waiting to shread you to pieces.